Cherish the Time Left
by bohogirl
Summary: Mark goes to visit Angel when she's sick and they talk. MarkAngel friendship


**Title: Cherish the Time Left  
Author: Jen  
Feedback: I love it sooo much!  
Pairing: Mark/Angel friends, maybe more if you look reeeaallly hard, mentions of Collins/Angel, Roger/Mimi  
Word Count: 1865  
Rating: PG-13  
Genre: Angst  
Summary: Mark goes to visit Angel when she's sick.  
Notes: Yes, Collins is at school. Don't know exactly when NYU starts classes but since most start at the end of August, I figured by early September at least, they'd be in school  
Special Thanks: electrakitty74 for looking it over!  
Spoilers: None  
Warnings: Angel's just sick  
Disclaimer: Rent isn't mine**

Mark walked quickly up the steps towards Angel and Collins' apartment, doing his best not to drop the bag of groceries in his hands. He knocked on the door and shuffled the bag to his other arm as he waited.

Angel pulled the door open and leaned against the door jamb, a small smile on her face, looking like she'd just woken up. Her short, slightly curly hair stuck up in a variety of directions and her robe hung loosely on her body, accentuating how much weight she had lost recently. Her pale skin punctuated more by the dark bags under her eyes. "Hey, Markie."

"Hi, Angel." Mark stepped into the apartment. "I brought food for the sick one."

Angel rolled her eyes and gave Mark a quick kiss on the cheek. "Very funny." She tied the robe around her small waist and pulled the door shut. "But it's good to see you."

Mark headed into what served as the kitchen and plopped the bag on the counter. "It's not much but it should help you put some weight back on."

Angel groaned and sank into the couch. "I don't even know if I could keep water down to be honest."

A few weeks ago, a nasty flu bug had invaded Angel's already weak immune system, landing her in bed, shaking and feverish for nearly two weeks. She was improving now, but the new drugs the doctors had put her on were not allowing her to keep much of anything down. Factoring in the weight she'd lost while she was sick, she was now literally skin and bones.

"You're looking a bit better, at least," Mark offered as he started unpacking the bag.

"Oh, what? I only look like I'm dying now instead of looking like I've actually died? Wonderful."

Mark frowned and moved to sit beside her on the couch. "Angel, come on. Whatever happened to the Angel who wouldn't even let a rainy day get hi...her down?"

"I think she ran away when I got sick." Angel coughed harshly and low in her lungs, sounding more like someone who had smoked seven packs a day then a 21-year-old who barely touched the marijuana her boyfriend brought home. "Maybe I coughed her out. And Collins wonders why I don't get any sleep. I spend half the night trying not to cough my lungs out. Surprised he can sleep through it."

"How's Collins feeling anyway?" Mark was worried that Collins was at risk of being stricken down just as horribly as Angel had been.

"He's not getting much sleep either, between making sure I'm ok and working on his class stuff. I think he's close to quitting. He says he'd rather be here then at NYU worrying if I'm ok."

Mark had to smile. That sounded like Collins, the same man who would show up at the loft at random hours, half in tears over Angel's condition. He hated leaving Angel during the day, worried about what he would come home to. "How about you? Feeling ok today?"

Angel sighed and leaned her head back on the couch. "If you look at the fact that I'm not living beside the toilet and I'm able to carry on a conversation…" She shook her head and met Mark's eyes. "I'd say today's a good day."

Mark frowned. That did sound like a good day but it killed him it was defined by the fact that Angel wasn't spending the day throwing up. He remembered when a good day was Angel walking through the streets of the East Village in her best dress, hand in hand with Collins or Mimi, laughing and smiling. Now it looked as though she hadn't slept in weeks. "You look exhausted. You should be lying down."

Angel grumbled a bit but stretched out on the couch, placing her head in Mark's lap. "I don't know anymore, Markie. I just want to go outside and live again. I hate being stuck in this apartment."

Mark absentmindedly ran his fingers through Angel's hair. "Soon enough you might be, Angel. Don't give up hope yet."

"What hope have I got? This is what's going to kill me in the end, Mark. Something as stupid as a flu virus or a cold virus or…or anything. One small sickness and I could end up lying in a hospital. And I don't want to end up there."

Mark had to bite his lip to keep from crying. He had spent months listening to Roger talk just like this but it never got to him the way her words just had. Maybe it wasAngel's usual exuberance for life, so vastly different from her current attitude. "You'll get better, Angel."

"I just don't want to end up in a hospital. Lying in a hospital bed waiting to die surrounded by sterile walls isn't living. I'd rather die here in my bed with Collins next to me."

"I think he'd be there beside you no matter where you were, Angel. A gutter, a bed, the floor, wherever. You know he'd be there."

Angel buried her face in Mark's thigh. "I know. And it kills me he has to watch me die." She rolled over and looked up into Mark's face. "And it kills me you might have to do the same thing four times. Me, Collins, Mimi, Roger."

"I'll be fine, Angel. Don't worry about me." In reality, as Mark looked down at Angel in his lap, his heart started breaking at the knowledge this wouldn't be the only time he'd watch someone he cared for deeply die in a way no one should have to die. Roger, who was his best friend, Collins, the man who was like his brother, Mimi, who had brought light back into Roger's life, and Angel, who had impacted their whole close-knit family more than anyone else ever had.

"You won't be. No one could be. Don't be ashamed about it, Mark. It's not wrong to feel bad about losing your friends when they're the ones that are dying. In fact, if you weren't, I'd be really worried."

"How is that you are feeling your worst, like you just want to crawl into a hole and never come out, yet you know exactly what to say to comfort those around you?"

Angel shrugged. "Talent I guess." She sat up and gave Mark a quick kiss. "You're one of my best friends, Mark, hell probably my best male friend. No matter how I feel, I hate to see you upset. You've put with a lot, Mark. You shouldn't compare it to what everyone else is going through or is going to go through. You've got your own shit to deal with."

Mark nodded and managed a weak smile. He'd come here to comfort Angel at Collins' request. As usual though, Angel had been more of a comfort, but he noticed the sparkle was back a bit inhereyes. Maybe playing therapist was exactly what Angel needed. "Do you want to try to eat now?"

"You're going to make eat anyway, aren't? Collins put you up to this, didn't he?"

"Yes I am, and yes he did." Mark stood up and hauled Angel to her feet. "Then you're going to get dressed," he said over his shoulder as he headed into the kitchen.

"Can I make a deal with you?"

Mark stopped and looked back at Angel. "Depends."

"If I eat and get dressed and manage to hold it down, can we go outside? Just for a bit!" Angel added when a scowl crossed over Mark's face. She stepped closer to her friend, grabbing his arm. "Please, Markie. I haven't been outside in a while. Collins wont even let me open the window. We can go out on the roof or something."

Mark sighed. He had to think of what was worse, Angel's wrath at not being able to go out or Collins' if she was let outside. "If we make it quick. I don't want Collins killing me or anything."

Angel grinned and kissed Mark's cheek. "I love you, you know that?"

Mark blushed. "Yeah, just…protect me from your boyfriend."

"Don't worry about him, I've got it covered."

While Angel only ate a piece of toast and one half of a pancake that Mark had made, she managed to keep it down. Mark ordered her to put on a sweatshirt despite the fact it was early September and still relatively warm out. The pair headed out onto the roof and looked down over the city.

"Feel like you can see the whole world from up here," Angel said, standing close to the edge.

"Well I did hear someone say New York City is basically the whole world confined to a few square miles."

"Thank you, Markie, for coming by. Talking to me." Angel looked over at her friend and smiled. She linked her arm through Mark's. "I've only had Collins the past few days and I love the man deeply, I really do, but everything revolved around me not doing this and me doing that. Nice to just talk to someone."

"Anytime you need it, Angel. Feels good to get out of the loft for a bit, away from Roger and Mimi who can't seem to decide if they're together or not while fielding calls from my mother and Maureen who can't seem to realize she's with Joanne. Good to have a somewhat normal conversation with someone."

"A normal conversation with dying drag queen?" Angel chuckled. "Only in New York."

After spending fifteen minutes outside, enjoying the fresh air, Mark managed to herd Angel back inside and get her to nap.

Collins arrived home around noon for lunch and to check up on Angel. He smiled when he walked in and saw Mark sitting at the counter, a cup of coffee in his hand reading the paper and Angel passed out on the couch. "Hey, man. Thanks for coming back. And spending some time with her. I haven't exactly been the best companion lately."

"It's fine. And he...she still loves you anyway. I should be heading back, though. Roger and Mimi are due to either fight or make up around now." Mark gave Collins a hug. "Tell Angel I said goodbye."

"I will."

Mark picked up his bag and headed down towards the street. He was almost at the front door to his apartment building when a pair of hands grabbed him. He spun around and was surprised to find Angel standing there.

"You didn't give me a hug good-bye." Angel pulled Mark into her arms and kissed his cheek. "Please, Mark, promise me you'll take care of yourself," she whispered.

Mark put his arm around Angel's waist and returned the hug. "I will, Angel."

Angel pulled away and kissed Mark again before heading back up to her apartment where Collins stood waiting.

Mark smiled up at the pair before heading out into the street. He was going to lose Angel soon, he knew that, but he would cherish their moments of friendship now and enjoy what little time he had left with a very dear friend.


End file.
